Never Enough Sake

by:  lovesrainscent

Disclaimer: I do not own the Naruto characters and stand to make no profit from posting this story.

The girl sat trembling in the moonlight, her knees drawn up to her chest, arms wrapped around them, trying to force herself to be calm. She swallowed hard and wiped a tear from her cheek with the heel of one hand. She wished he’d hurry up and get here and get this over with.The soft rustle of leaves and footsteps let her know he was approaching. She supposed he did that on purpose since he could have easily appeared silently enough to elude even her senses. How very thoughtful of him, she thought sarcastically to herself, how very considerate.

“Tsunade?” His voice was soft, tinged with concern, but she knew what he wanted most was assurance that she had completed her mission.

“It’s done, Hokage-sama.” She wiped another tear away. She’d be damned if she let him see her cry. Then viciously, with as much venom as she could put into her words she added, “Is that good enough for you? Or would you like a play-by-play since I know you’re into that kind of thing. Sorry you didn’t get to be there to watch!” She fairly spat the words at him.

He sighed and settled himself down to the ground beside her. She turned away from him and ducked her face between her arms. She wouldn’t let him see her like this, she refused! He put one arm around her and she tried to flinch away but he held her tight, pulling her over to him, so that he could hold her in both arms. He kissed the top of her head and said, “I’m sorry, Tsunade-chan. I’m sorry. But I had to order you to. For the village. For the future.”

She sat up then and scoffed derisively, “For the village! What about for the team? You know, I liked you a helluva a lot better when you were Sensei, not Hokage-sama. ”

He let go of her and fished in his pockets for a cigarette and lighter. He took his time lighting one and drawing on it. He almost offered it to her before catching himself. He took a couple more long drags off the cigarette, breathing the smoke out through his nostrils, trying to choose not only his words but his tone carefully. “Tsunade, you’re a shinobi of the Leaf. Your grandfather founded this village. It should be your honor to die for this village. To give your life for it.”

She laughed harshly and looked skyward. “Honor? You call this honor? I doubt seriously my grandfather would have pimped me out like this tonight, Hokage-sama!”

He sighed heavily, “You’re a kunoichi. Seduction has never been out of the realm of possibility. It doesn’t happen as often as it used to but the potential is always there for it to be part of the job. You know that.”

“Seduction, yes. Espionage, yes. But this…this…was wrong. He’s my friend. My very best friend…”

Sarutobi studied her in the moonlight. “What happened, Tsunade. When I gave you the mission you knew who you were seeing and what you were doing. What happened?”

She turned to face him, the first time tonight. Her eyes were swimming with tears. She whispered so softly that he had to strain to hear her, “He said my name, Sarutobi-Sensei. He called my name.”

For a moment, Sarutobi panicked. “Did he…did he know?”

She shook her head. “You don’t get it do you. No, he didn’t know it was me. My genjutsu’s not the best but it’s good enough coupled with what I slipped into his drink. I’m sure he didn’t know. As far as he’ll remember he just spent the time with some little dark-haired whore he picked up at a bar. It’s just that… I’m who he wanted to be with. Me. Tsunade. And I…I…I never knew until he said it. All those times he’s teased me and I never knew he meant it…”

“Oh. I see. Well…then…”

Tsunade could hear the relaxation ease into his voice. Her blood turned to icicles in her veins. She could hear her own heart beat drumming in her ears. She thought she was going to be sick. She hadn’t told him anything he didn’t already know!

“You bastard!” she hissed, jerking away from him. “You knew! You knew how he felt about me? And you still sent me?”

He answered her question with one of his own, “Are you in love with him?”

“Of course, I love him, you asshole!” she snapped back.

“That’s not what I asked, Tsunade. Answer me! Are you in love with him?”

“I…I don’t know…maybe…no…not now,” she answered weakly. “But it’s still wrong. He loves me and it’s wrong to use him that way. Why couldn’t … why don’t… why do we even have to do this?”

“I’ve already tried to explain, it’s difficult, Tsunade-chan to explain to you how I’ve seen it. But I, we, the village is going to need the child you’re carrying. I don’t know exactly in what way, I just know that he has to be born. He has to be your child and Jiraiya’s and we’re going to need him if we’re going to survive.”

“I’ll tell him!” she snapped angrily.

“Tell him what, Tsunade? That you were willing to sleep with him but only for money or under orders? I might have believed that if you hadn’t figured out he was really in love with you. But now that you know he is are you really going to be that cruel?”

“Who’s cruel, you cold hearted son of a bitch? I could stop it, you know. Right now. I could stop it. Did you know that? I’ve got fine enough control so that I could stop my own chakra flow to my womb and end it this minute.”

“You won’t.” His voice was heavy with resignation. “It’s Jiraiya’s child. You’re going to kill it? Tsunade…as much death as we’ve seen, as you’ve seen, is it really so hard? Is it really so awful to be asked to create a new life?”

Right then, she wanted nothing more than to cry like a little girl, to have Sensei tell her that everything was going to be all right but she was damned if she would let him know that. She stood up, saying, “He’s better than the rest of us put together. You, me, Orochimaru, he’s better than any of us will ever be.”

She shoved her hand in one pocket, withdrew some bills and tossed them at Sarutobi. “Here, I think it’s customary for the whore to turn her money over to her pimp. Don’t bother following me. I’ll let you know where I wind up in nine months. You can send somebody to pick him up then. I’m not coming back. And don’t worry, I won’t drink and I won’t smoke. Can’t make any promises about cursing or gambling. But I promise you this. After nine months there’s never gonna be enough sake to make me forget tonight.”


~ by lovesrainscent on February 2, 2009.

17 Responses to “Never Enough Sake”

  1. FIRST!?

  2. Second! Now time to read the awesomeness! *Pulls out kunai and gets ready to defend Sarutobi* 😉

  3. EAT THAT SUPERTREK lol i am first

  4. WOW 0_0 the last ne was the best that as really good ibiki intense and….just WOW i love it

  5. i wonder if something like that is gonna happen in the manga im so curious now

  6. Third!

  7. @Lightice: 😛

    @Lovesrainscent: *Twirls Kunai on finger and flicks it at Loves. Kunai is deflected, rerouted, and stuck into Super’s kneecap* >_<

    F**K! This is Hocus-Pocus! This is a defilement of the great 3rd Hokage’s name! This is a low blow to Sarutobi who loved and defended the great village of Konoha and EVERYONE in it until his death! This is…this is actually a very good story? No, dammit I’ve betrayed my own self again! -_-

    Ok, I admit this is an excellently told story but I was prepared for that. I’ll even let that theory of Minato being Jiraiya’s and Tsunade’s baby without Jiraiya even knowing pass. Clever clever ;)…but what I can’t let pass is Sarutobi being taken for a pimp! LMAO (no it’s not funny…I’m laughing at something else). I won’t waste my time defending him…I’ll just show you this ttp://! Now you look into that sweet old man’s eyes and tell him he’s a pimp! *Loves opens her mouth to say something-* GAH! Don’t actually do it….*sigh* Lol, anyway I really enjoyed the story and keep up the good work!

    Best Part: 😀

    “She shoved her hand in one pocket, withdrew some bills and tossed them at Sarutobi. “Here, I think it’s customary for the whore to turn her money over to her pimp…”

    LMAO! XD

    Actually I had two favorite parts the second being more serious:

    ““You won’t.” His voice was heavy with resignation. “It’s Jiraiya’s child. You’re going to kill it? Tsunade…as much death as we’ve seen, as you’ve seen, is it really so hard? Is it really so awful to be asked to create a new life?””

    Damn, the Hokage seems to know what he’s talking about. 😛 …Even though he’s pimping out Tsunade. XD

  8. Nicely written finish to your series, Loves! I’ve enjoyed the way you’ve delved into Tsunade’s psyche for us, exposing the woman behind the monster strength, and can’t wait to read more of your stories in the future ^_^

  9. I really hope you write more of these loves! They were all very good!

  10. @everybody – thanks for reading along with these fics. It’s been fun posting them here. Thanks to Ibiki for suggesting it and setting them up.

    @ibiki – awww – no picture for this one? I was looking forward to see what you’d pick out.

    @lightice – I myself am curious to see what if any more will be revealed about Minato’s parentage in the manga. While I doubt seriously that it will be like mine above, I do think there are more family secrets to be revealed. Look at Tsunade’s face when Jiraiya’s talking about how he’s never been a parent but training Minato was like raising a son (help me out with a link here supertrek) – Tsunade’s got something she’s burning to tell him, but I just don’t know what it is. And I’m dying to know.

    @supertrek – I deserve the kunai, I really do. And I really do agree that Sarutobi gave his life in defense of the village. This whole thing came about when I was thinking about Gaara and the Kazekage and just wondering about the question – “If the Kazekage’s going to do that to his own wife and child just how far would ANY of the Kage’s go to do what they perceive as best for their village?”

    @elfarren – Thank you. I don’t tend to speculate about what’s coming up next in the manga but usually write about what I think may have happened in the past to try to explain why a certain character behaves the way they do.

    @of815 – Thanks. As for writing more…Jiraiya is dead *sob* and my muse is in mourning. Meanwhile Kyouraku Shunsui’s looking mighty good in that haori…;-)

  11. @Loves: Here’s the link to the beginning of that conversation ttp:// The part where they talk about Minato is a little farther up but I didn’t know where you wanted to start. So here you go…

    (Asian Accent): “That’ll be 20 dollas!” 😉

    Lol, jkjk! You don’t deserve a Kunai Loves…just a smoke bomb to the LUNGS!!!! Lol, no…not that either…since it was such an enjoyable story I’ll look past it and pretend you meant well deep down inside. 😀

  12. @supertrek – thanks – that’s the conversation – the whole chapter’s great. So much unsaid *Arrrrghhh* kishimoto kills me.

    And I DID mean well. Honest. Sarutobi did what he did for the good of the village 🙂

  13. bravo loves, bravo

  14. That was excellent; an excellent series. Thanks for such a wonderful read. 🙂

  15. @love this is amazing the of them have been great i love the adult tones you have put in your fiction dont get me wrong love naruto but sometimes it kills me how pg it all is (minus the violence but im America so im used to it lol)

  16. As always, well done LovesRS. I had read this one before, so Sarutobi’s obduracy was less of a shock to the system this go round. In fact, I’d say that I like this story best, go figure.

    As for Shunsui, he is bleach’s version of the Pervy Sage… ‘cept he’s comfortable wearing pink. Sounds like we’re going to be reading stories about Shunsui and Lisa-chan or Nanau-chan very soon.

  17. Great job loves!

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